Disclaimer:


If you have issues, or baggage, you may be offended by what you read here. I work through my self loathing of my own fat, and my own fat issues, and I’m told this comes across as loathing all fat people. That is simply not the case.

Here I talk about my issues and my findings, without political correctness. I am not concerned with your issues, or your baggage, or what you may take from this. The title is "My Journey".

This blog is not meant to inspire anyone. I take no responsibility for what you take away from here. You are here as a guest into my inner thoughts.

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Tuesday, September 22, 2009

... and she lived happily ever after. The end.

When I started this blog, it was for me to keep track of how I was doing. It was a place for me to vent my feelings, brainstorm ideas, bang out epiphanies. And I did.

Then I started getting followers. And it was good. So I started talking about my blog in real life, to my real peeps. And it was good... for a while. But then, it wasn't.

You see, I can't be me here. I can't vent my frustrations. I can't talk about what bugs me. I can't discuss my feelings. I can't talk about my marriage. I can't talk about my relationships. I can't talk about anything at all except me. And I can't even talk about me.

Do you see the disclaimer at the top of this blog? That's there because all of a sudden I was getting lambasted with responsibility. That because people were looking to me for inspiration, I had a responsibility to not lead them astray. To watch my every word, so as not to offend. To not give bad advice, so as not to kill anyone. To be careful how I word my selftalk, so as not to lead anyone to eating disorders.

This blog is no longer about me.

And so I am leaving it. Because I still need what I started in the first place. A place where I can be me. Where I can talk about me. Where I can be open, honest and upfront about my issues. Where noone in real life knows about. Where noone in blogland knows who I am.

I thank you. I thank you for encouragin me. For showing me that I am not alone in this journey called life. For commiserating with me when the wagon is far off in the distance. For laughing with me. For crying with me. For sharing with me.

I am choosing to leave this blog here. I won't be adding to it. But it is a powerful testimony to what I accomplished. I want to keep it for myself. I want to visit it, and see what worked. See what didn't. And remind myself of where I came from.

So be well, my friends. Enjoy your journey. I'm enjoying mine.

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17 comments:

marie said...

You've done so well and it should stay as an example for everyone :)

But feel free to check back in whenever you feel like it.

I know I'll miss reading. ♥

Bex said...

Thank you for the time on your blog!! Best wishes and lets keep in touch other ways ... Love you DEE!!

~ugly girl with a beautiful heart~ said...

I've only been reading your blog for a short time but I appreciate everything you've put into it that's helped me and my journey. Thank you.

Pheonix said...

NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!

*sniff* Krista saaaad :(

Sigh... I suppose I understand... *whine* but I will miss reading ya!

Chris H said...

I think it sucks when a blogger gives up because of what 'someone' has said in a comment on your blog! Or because you feel stressed about what you can and can't say on your own blog! Not on.
You will be missed.
A PRIVATE blog is a good thing too... where you CAN say whatever the hell you want... and only people you want reading it can read it! I have one... I only update it when I feel the need to talk about totally private stuff... and to vent properly!

Perhaps that is a way you can still blog? Just a thought.

SeaShore said...

Good luck, and take care.

M and A said...

congratulations on all you have accomplished!

Becca55 said...

You will be missed dee I love reading your posts. Please stay in touch on NM :)

Carrie said...

Man, I just started reading! I do understand though the need for privacy when delving into personal matter. There are so many people that like to judge in life and it's normal to judge, but I feel if you are actively pursuing someone's private, personal thoughts and they are not asking for advice then you should keep your judgement to yourself. I'm sorry this has happened to you Dee. I love your experience. You are REAL! I wish you well on the rest of your journey and hope that you find the place where you are comfortable to work through the things in your life that you need to face. And if you ever want to start writing in here again, I'll be happy to read it, without judgement! :o)

paulawannacracker said...

Wow... today is the first time I ever visited your blog and I'm sorry to hear its the last time I'll be here as well. I totally get what yu're sayin. I wish you luck and congratulations on being so true to who you are.

Angela Power said...

Dee I have sincerely enjoyed reading your blog and thank you for your contribution. I totally get it. My employers read my blog and it has indeed sensored my content. Some of it is in a good way, but other times there are things I want to say and I feel obligated to restrain myself.

I hope you get your outlet you need :-)

Kat said...

Hi Dee,

I don't understand why people need to be such judgmental jerks sometimes! I loved your blog. I think I saw somewhere that you started a new one. I would love to continue to follow your journey. If you are open to it, please email me with you new address.

Best of luck to you. I think you are pretty fabulous!

Marisa @Loser for Life said...

Dee, I can totally understand where you are coming from. My family members read my blog and it frustrates me when I get called on some things I say or about how I feel. I know that they are showing they care, but, man, sometimes you just want to say stuff, get it all out and move on. "Real World People" don't realize that. I guess it shows us how powerful the written word is. I'll miss you lots! We were Biggest Loser Blog Edition buddies from the start and I thank you for encouraging me to do that challenge, even though I sucked royally at it -LOL! Hope you'll still visit me - I'd love to hear from you!

Best wishes!!!

Fatinah said...

wow - I'm really going to miss you. You say stuff I wouldn't even think and always give me a laugh. Best wishes. I hope you find the outlet you need.

EricaAnn said...

Just thought I'd let you know I'm missing your inspiration xo

Unknown said...

awww that blows....

AllAbout said...

hey!! you have a wonderful blog. thanks for sharing your weight lost progress here. keep it up and never give up. you can do it.

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